Adoption Update

Wondering about the adoption?? Yes, we are still doing it! Today we scheduled our homestudy appointments with our Social Worker-YES! We are in the process of paperchasing (i.e. gathering all of the documents) too, so we are checking items off the list. I think I will eventually post a timeline here on our blog. When you adopt internationally, you tend to celebrate each small completed task as a monumental step in bringing your child home-every tiny step brings you closer.......I have to keep reminding myself that we have only been "officially" working on this adoption for a little over a month (that includes all of the time we spent applying to our agencies).

I keep reminding myself that we are "seasoned" adoptive parents. For the most part, this process is out of the realm of our control. It will happen when it happens, period. End of story. And yes (I cannot believe I am actually saying this) you WILL eventually end up with the child that was meant to be yours. I swore I would puke (or spew obscenities) at the next person who told us this while we were waiting for our Alina Jayne to come home to us from China. But you know what? She is PERFECT for our family. She could not fit in better if she was born to us from our bodies! Somehow (although I do not claim to understand it), it all works out the way it is supposed to.

So we continue to plug away at the gathering of documents, interviews of the family, fingerprinting, physicals, and other intrusions into the most intimate parts of our lives...............until one day our child is FINALLY home from Ethiopia.

Check back soon!

The Times They Are A-Changin'

We are thrilled to finally be able to announce that we will be adding another child to our family through the miracle of adoption!

Since adopting Alina Jayne in 2006, we have known we wanted to have more children. In fact, I have always wanted 2+ children with Matt. After taking a year to settle in after arriving home from China, we started to seriously look at adopting again. We looked at EVERY conceivable program available, researched more agencies than we even knew existed, talked to many other families who adopted about the countries they had adopted from, their experiences, and the agencies they used. In January, we were excited to have finally decided not only to move forward with the process, but were relieved to have decided on an agency and a country! By this time, we had finally whittled our long list of possibilities down to 3 countries. We had a very difficult time deciding between South Korea and Ethiopia, but ultimately decided that we felt more comfortable with the familiar-Asian kids! We sent our preliminary application to an agency for an adoption from South Korea (and were accepted), and started to slowly gather some of the hundreds of documents needed for an international adoption.

……………but something did not feel right about our choice. We kept feeling like we were leaving something behind. As if we had left behind the country of Ethiopia, simply because it was easier to stay inside our comfort zone. This was such a struggle for me, as since we had begun researching the possible countries, I had felt such a connection to Ethiopia (it was exactly the same connection that I felt when we were preparing to adopt from China). Each and every time I would picture our next child, the child I saw in my mind was Ethiopian (just like the child I pictured in my mind in 2005 was Chinese)-but our application was for South Korea!

In early June we officially withdrew our application for the adoption from South Korea-and started doing in-dept research about agencies with Ethiopia programs. I talked to MORE people who had adopted from there, researched MORE agencies, and we did MUCH soul-searching. We submitted our application to our placing agency on July 16th and to our home study agency on August 6th. So now it is officially safe to make this announcement!

We are just now starting to work on the 10 hours of required adoption education, starting to collect some of the seemingly endless documents needed, scheduling appointments with our Social Worker, and then once again preparing our home for a new child-sigh! So much to do!!! All said, it will take us a few months to get through the home study process and gather our documents. Once all of the home study appointments are done, and the documents are in hand (remember from the last time, that endless pile of documents is the dossier), the dossier will make its way to Ethiopia. From there we start the official wait for referral, which will likely take 12-18 months (if we are lucky). We are requesting a child 0-30 months, preferably a girl but are also open to a sibling group of 2 girls or a sibling group of one boy and one girl-just like we were with Alina Jayne, but this time, we are open to older children. We wanted AYAP (as young as possible) when we adopted Alina Jayne!

Anyone who knows me and followed our first blog knows I am really into education and learning/teaching the history, culture and customs of our child’s birth country. I will not disappoint you this time around! Please read the history lesson below!

Check back often-things are sure to be interesting on this new journey!!!



Ethiopia is a land of rich soil, rich culture and yet, extreme poverty. It is a landlocked country situated in the Horn of Africa near the Red Sea. Ethiopia is bordered by Eritrea to the north, Sudan to the west, Kenya to the south, Somalia to the east and Djibouti to the north, with the capital city of Addis Ababa (meaning “New Flower”). The country has as many as 80 nationalities speaking 80 languages, with the official language being Amharic. The religious communities include Christians, Muslims, and Jews.

Ethiopia is the only African country that was not colonized under British rule, and its culture and traditions stretch back more than 3,000 years. It is one of the oldest countries in the world and was the home of the Queen of Sheba. The empire, which started with Sheba's son, Menelik, continued until 1974 when the death of Haile Selassie marked the end of the 3000 year old dynasty. Following his death, there was a civil war in the country until 1991 when a transitional government was formed. The seventeen years of civil war bankrupted the country of Ethiopia.

Ethiopians are a very proud and gracious people who respect one another and cherish their children. This graciousness remains despite extreme challenges. Nearly half of all Ethiopians live below the poverty line. The country’s economy is based largely on agriculture, which suffers from frequent droughts and poor farming practices. In this nation of over 77 million, the life average life expectancy is a mere 48 years. The infant mortality rate is nineteenth highest in the world. An estimated 2.1 million Ethiopians are living with AIDS.

It is estimated that close to 4.8 million Ethiopian children have been orphaned by HIV/AIDS and other diseases of poverty. Despite all of the challenges, families try their best to support each other and care for the children. When a parent is no longer able to care for a child due to death or illness, another relative will often take that child to live with them. They try to keep the children with biological family members for as long as they can. Sadly, despite the best of intentions, extended families are often simply unable to care for all the orphaned children due to their own failing health and extreme poverty.

The Times They Are A-Changin'


"Come gather 'round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You'll be drenched to the bone.
If your time to you
Is worth savin'
Then you better start swimmin'
Or you'll sink like a stone
For the times they are a-changin'

Come writers and critics
Who prophesize with your pen
And keep your eyes wide
The chance won't come again
And don't speak too soon
For the wheel's still in spin
And there's no tellin' who
That it's namin'
For the loser now
Will be later to win
For the times they are a-changin'

Come senators, congressmen
Please heed the call
Don't stand in the doorway
Don't block up the hall
For he that gets hurt
Will be he who has stalled
There's a battle outside
And it is ragin'.
It'll soon shake your windows
And rattle your walls
For the times they are a-changin'

Come mothers and fathers
Throughout the land
And don't criticize
What you can't understand
Your sons and your daughters
Are beyond your command
Your old road is
Rapidly agin'.
Please get out of the new one
If you can't lend your hand
For the times they are a-changin'

The line it is drawn
The curse it is cast
The slow one now
Will later be fast
As the present now
Will later be past
The order is
Rapidly fadin'.
And the first one now
Will later be last
For the times they are a-changin'"

Copyright ©1963 Bob Dylan

St. Louis/Children's Hope International Reunion-2008

What a great time we had during our trip to St. Louis! We were able to visit with 3 other families who traveled with us to Hunan in May, 2006. We were also able to visit with several other families who who traveled to China with us, but who went to other provinces to get their babies. It was so amazing to see everyone again, and to watch how the girls have blossomed and adjusted to their new lives in the United States. It is truly unbelievable.

There are many memories of our trip to China, but one stands out so vividly. As our bus pulled up to the Civil Affairs Office in Changsha, Hunan (after our flight from Beijing was delayed 2 hours and we only had 10 minutes to check into our hotel before going to meet our babies), we noticed two babies being held by two women in a second story window, waving to us. I remember Matt pointing it out, saying "look, honey, there are two babies in that window!" I told him to get the camera out and take a pic before they were gone, so he did. After we got our babies and returned to the hotel, I decided to update our blog and post some pics. Lo and behold, one of those babies in the pic was our Alina Jayne-the other is the daughter of a family that we see every year at the reunion and stay in touch with throughout the year. It has given us a real sense of connection. I have posted the pic of them from 2006 and one from 2008. The only difference is that Alina Jayne is on the right in 2006 and the left in 2008.



On Friday we went to the Magic House (http://www.magichouse.org) with two other families-the kids had a great time. The place was very busy, but there was so much for them to do there. Afterward we went to dinner and then the girls had ice cream in the food court at the mall. They burned off a LOT of energy playing-and even managed to chase some obviously not very kid-accustomed people away from where we were sitting! Too bad they could not see the beauty in the moment!

Saturday was the CHI Reunion Picnic. The kids got to visit again-and burn off more energy! After the reunion was over, another group of families went to the local butterfly house and playground and then to dinner. This weekend was definitely an 'Asian Invasion" wherever we went! So many China Beauties in one place!

We left for home on Sunday and some how ended downtown. We literally happened upon the Budweiser Brewery and decided to see if they were open. They were, so we browsed the lobby and the gift shop-we had tickets for a tour, but 2 of the other Hunan families had decided that maybe we should do a brewery tour next year, so we decided to wait and tour it then. Ironically, the day after we were there, they were sold to ImBev, so we'll be touring a Swedish-owned brewery next year!

Looking forward to next year's reunion already!

BY THE WAY-does everyone know you can click on the pics to view them full-size? I know I have a lot of technologically-challenged friends and family reading this blog!

Check back again soon!

The St. Louis Arch

China Window Babies 2006

China Window Babies 2008


Magic House Water Room

Magic House Library

Magic House Puppet Show

Ice Cream in the Food Court on Friday

Climbing on Poor Liza!


More Mall Clowning

Reunion Fun

Did I eat that stuff???


Butterfly House

Dinner on Saturday

The King of Beers!

Daddy & Alina Jayne

Mama & Alina Jayne

March-July, 2008

Did you wonder where we have been? I am ashamed that I have not posted since Alina Jayne's B-day in February!

As you can see, this is a FAR DIFFERENT blog than our previous Red Thread Kids blog, which we have had since we started the paper chase for Alina Jayne in January, 2005. Unfortunately, our very gracious and talented web host will not be able to continue to host our site anymore, due to family reasons. I had been planning to try making our own blog in January, 2009-it just happened a little sooner. So, please be patient-this is a work in progress! There will not be as many bells and whistles (hopefully just for a while) as our other blog had-but I am challenging myself to make this blog interesting! I do think the old blog will still be available to view for a while yet.

Check out the pic of Matt holding a crying Zhao Hong Qin (now known as Alina Jayne)on Gotcha Day in Changsha, Hunan on May 9th, 2006. The pic next to that is Alina Jayne at home on our second Gotcha Day Anniversary on May 9th, 2008-WHAT A DIFFERENCE 2 YEARS MAKES!











Not much has happened since the last posting, but so much at the same time. Ms. Alina Jayne is no longer a baby, and she wastes no time correcting anyone who calls her "baby." Whenever I tell her "you're Mama's baby” she tells me, "MAMA, I am not a baby, I am a KID!" Okay, fine-but she will always be my baby!

She is still staying at Papa's house when Matt and I are at work, and she really loves to play the Papa card. If she doesn't like something that her Dad or I do or say, she'll tell us "Papa said I don't have to eat that" or "Papa said I can stay up" etc. Can't wait until she is a teenager!

Alina Jayne's cousin Charles spent the weekend with us in March-they should be brother and sister! She is STILL tattling on him for things he did when he stayed-but if you ask her-Charles "did XYZ LAST NIGHT." Oh well, she doesn't have any concept of time!

We have celebrated our second Gotcha Day anniversary on May 9th, 2nd Adoption Day anniversary on May 10th, Mother's Day, Memorial Day, Father's Day & Papa's Birthday and July 4th. Oh, and Alina Jayne’s Daddy’s 40th b-day (although he’d prefer to forget it). She baked and frosted his cake-it was a wreck, but he said it was his best birthday cake ever! Alina Jayne planted a rose bush for her Birthmother (who she refers to as her China Tummy Mama), and a lily for her Foster Mama. We do this every year for Mother's Day. She loves to water and care for those flowers, and tells everyone and anyone who will listen all about them and who they are for! Although, sometimes people don’t understand what a “China Tummy Mama” is!

On July 4th we watched fireworks from home-Alina Jayne thought they looked like "red-hot marshmallows." She was very quick to inform her Dad that "Fireworks were made in China just like me!" She is sooooo proud about all things Chinese. I hope she never loses that pride her in culture.

She started doing this really funny thing recently (well, she does a lot of hilarious things)-she extended her arm as if to introduce me, and said "This is my Mother" then she told me "Mama, now you do it and say this is my daughter." So, we have to do this routine together-we introduce each other this way, then we have to bow together and say "Thank you, thank you." Not really sure where she got this-she has NEVER called me "Mother" almost always "Mama" and sometimes "Mommy." It is too cute.

She has always talked about fishing and even pretended to fish from the bed, couch, etc using a robe tie or shoe lace. Well, Matt found a nice, private fishing pond about an hour from our house, signed us up and bought Alina Jayne a pink princess fishing pole. On her first fishing trip, Ms. Alina Jayne caught the first fish of the day! It was a really cute bluegill! She sat in her chair calling out “here fishy fishy.” Every 5 minutes she’d yell, “Dad, I need help over here-I need help getting a fish.” We have been taking her fishing every weekend. Every time we are heading out to fish, I'll say "I'm catching the first fish today." Alina Jayne always protests that "those are her fish and she is catching the first one!" Honestly, all she does is cast her princess line out and the fish jump on! She has managed to catch the first one (or 3 or 4) every time we’ve taken her!

This Saturday is our adoption agency's annual reunion picnic in St. Louis. We are sooooo looking forward to attending and seeing some of our travel mates and other families we went through the adoption process with. On Friday we are meeting 3 of the families we traveled with to Hunan with. We are going to the Magic House (Children's hands-on museum) in St. Louis. It will be so nice to see our travel mates and all of the Chinese Beauties. I promise to (eventually) post photos.

Take care and stop by again.