Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Just give me a moment.............
....to pout, or have a pity party, or whatever you want to call it.
Today was "Baby Dedication Day" at church. It is done once a year to allow the parents to present their babies to the congregation (it is not a baptism). Obviously, I was ooohing and aaahhing along with all of the other people at the precious bambinos. But, at the same time, I was feeling, well, kind of left out. Now, we are new to the church, but our "baby" is 4, and the dedication is for kiddos aged 2 and under. Then most were boys (which is likely what we would be referred), so my heart strings were really being tugged on.
Now, I am a logical person. I know that even if all had gone as WE had planned, and we were able to accept the referral of the baby we were referred in March, HE still would not have been home for this dedication today. This logical person was thinking very illogically today, and yes, I will admit it, feeling a tad sorry for myself, maybe even, dare I say, a bit jealous of the parents in the front of the church with their babies. I started to doubt this would ever happen, sure that something else would go wrong.
After the service, errands, and lunch with two of my favorite people (my hubby and daughter), I snapped out of it. I have faith that everything will work out when it is supposed to and as it is supposed to, and that NONE of this will ever happen in MY time. Just like it all did with Alina Jayne.
An update: our adoption agency is in the process of referring babies to families whose dossiers went to Ethiopia in late January, 2009. Ours went on November 14th, 2008. We are supposed to be back in line where we were when we put our plans on hold, "back to the front of the line" as they say. I would imagine we should hear something in the next couple of months.
So now that I'm over myself, enjoy the pics of our weekend.
Friday, May 15, 2009
Friday Fishing-05/15/09
We had planned to go fishing on Saturday morning, but it looks like there will be rain. Matt decided we should go after I got off work this afternoon. Since this is my short day, I decided, WHY NOT! Heck, I can even sleep in on Saturday if we fished today!
Well, Matt and I caught zippo, zero, but Alina Jayne of course, caught the first (and second) fish. Okay, the ONLY fish! After she caught the first one, she started singing "I caught the first fish again, I caught the first fish again" and made up a dance to go with it. I am sure you'll be able to figure out which pic that was!
Happy weekend. Hoping to plant more flowers on Saturday.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Thankful Thursday-05/14/09
With my fourth Mother's Day just a pleasant memory, I cannot go without proclaiming my thankfulness for the precious gift I have in my daughter.
While I am always thankful for the opportunity to be able to adopt her as our own, I must give special thanks to her Birthmother. Without her and her selflessness, Alina Jayne would not be our daughter today. As I celebrate each Mother’s day, my joy is always tempered with the bittersweet truth that along with my happiness, is a sorrow for her Birthmother's tremendous loss. As I look at my daughter, I wonder if her Birthmother misses her. Does Alina Jayne look like her? Does she have her personality? Does she get her love of the outdoors from her? Does her Birthmother wonder the same thing about the baby girl she could not keep? Does she regret her decision? Does she have other children? I feel sorrow for all of the things her Birthmother is missing. Alina Jayne's spicy personality, her headstrong ways, her moods, her grace, the way she is blossoming into a beautiful young lady, the way she learns so many new things every day. While I am eternally grateful for each morning as she wakes up, kissing me, telling me "it's a sunny day Mama, I love you," and for each evening when she says "you always tuck me in don’t you Mama? It's because you love me so much, right?" I am saddened that her Birthmother cannot see how happy......and loved she is.
I am also eternally grateful for the Foster Family who raised her until Matt and I traveled to China to bring her home. They cared for her from the time she was one month old, until we arrived in China when she was 15 months old. The fact that she did not have to live in an institution, but rather with a family, consisting of a Mama, Daddy, their biological daughter and a Grandmother, meant that she was able to more easily have her needs met on a consistent basis. I believe that has helped her in immeasurable ways in terms of trust and bonding.
Alina Jayne's Foster Family
We may never know why her Birthmother could not raise her, or how she felt about her decision. I do know that we will be forever grateful for her Birthmother for giving her life, for her Foster Family who lovingly cared for her as their own, and for the Chinese Government, who entrusted us to raise one of their own children. All of these people helped make us into the family we are today.
Our first pics of Alina Jayne (from her referral Package)
Thank you..............
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Celebrations!!
Today has been an amazingly special day for us! Not only is it my fourth Mother's Day (third home), but exactly 3 years ago today, we adopted our sweet Alina Jayne in Changsha, Hunan.
***You can click on any collage to enlarge it
05/10/06
Adoption Day
Civil Affairs Office-Changsha, Hunan
In the United States, official business is certified by a signature of the parties involved. In China, while a signature is used, a person's right thumb print is also placed on official documents in red ink. The adoption paperwork was no exception. Since the babies could obliviously not sign their names, their right footprints were stamped onto the adoption paperwork in red ink along with the parent's thumbprints. Ever since her first footprint was taken in China, I have kept the tradition of taking Alina Jayne's footprint every year on the anniversary of her adoption.
Footprints-then & now
Today was a big day for another reason-Matt and I were baptized at the church we joined. While both of us were baptized as babies, we have never attended church on a regular basis since we were married. Actually, while I was baptized as a Lutheran, I never attended at all growing up, however, Matt did. My Dad was a Baptist and my Mom a Lutheran, so I suppose it was easier to not go at all than to compromise and all go to one church.
Anyone who knows what has gone on in our lives in the last several months, knows a LOT has happened. While much of it has been what some would call "bad," Matt and I started to realize that it was The Lord who was placing these things in our lives and on our hearts. We started to look more closely at our faith, and made the decision to meet with the Pastor of the church associated with Alina Jayne’s school. On February 18th 2009, we were saved in the Pastor's office. From that moment forward, amazing things happened in our lives. Matt was seriously injured only three days later, and could have lost his life. We had a referral for a baby we could not adopt.....the list goes on and on, but trust me when I say, we have had MANY trials. But we have also had more blessings than we can count or deserve.
We met some wonderful people from the church shortly after Matt's accident, and they were so supportive during our difficult time. We felt we could have reached out to them at any time and they would have been there to help (and we were not even members of the church yet). We finally asked them what we had to do to officially join the church, and they told us that the next step after being saved was baptism. After watching other people being baptized for the last several weeks, we got the courage to go forward today-THANK YOU Don, Frances & Emily for being there with us and for us-we would not be truthful if we did not admit that it was your positive influence that help to lead us in this direction! A big thanks to Dawn & Brandi for coming today too-it meant so much to have you share our special day!
05/10/09
At home & the Baptism
After church, we came home to open presents. Not only my Mother's Day presents, but also Alina Jayne’s. We always get her a small gift to celebrate the anniversary of our "Gotcha Day" or "Forever Family Day" on May 9th, as well as something on the official Adoption Day on May 10th. I was finally able to open the handmade flower pot and marigold from Alina Jayne (she made it in pre-school) that she has been begging me to open since Wednesday! Alina Jayne & Matt got me a wonderful digital photo frame to display the thousands of photos I take! Alina Jayne got a new bell for her bike & sidewalk chalk for Forever Family Day, and a pair of roller-skates for Adoption Day.
After the gifts were opened, we went outside so Alina Jayne could plant her flowers for her China Tummy Mama & Foster Mama. Every year on Mother's Day, she plants a mini rose bush for her China Tummy Mama (aka Birth mom) and a lily for her Foster Mama. She also tried out the new skates, and did amazingly well-way better than I did on my first try as a kid. She is STILL mad that she cannot "go super fast." She can't accept that she cannot be perfect in all she does. We'll need to work on that!
5/10/09
Flowers for her China Tummy Mama & Foster Mama & the new skates
Last weekend we decorated my Mom's grave for Mother’s Day. We lost her to cancer in 2000, just a few months after Matt and I were married. I know she is looking down upon us today, watching me with my daughter who is named after her. She taught me so much.........I only hope that I can be half the Mother she was to my sisters and me.
Happy Mother’s Day.
1968
***You can click on any collage to enlarge it
05/10/06
Adoption Day
Civil Affairs Office-Changsha, Hunan
In the United States, official business is certified by a signature of the parties involved. In China, while a signature is used, a person's right thumb print is also placed on official documents in red ink. The adoption paperwork was no exception. Since the babies could obliviously not sign their names, their right footprints were stamped onto the adoption paperwork in red ink along with the parent's thumbprints. Ever since her first footprint was taken in China, I have kept the tradition of taking Alina Jayne's footprint every year on the anniversary of her adoption.
Footprints-then & now
Today was a big day for another reason-Matt and I were baptized at the church we joined. While both of us were baptized as babies, we have never attended church on a regular basis since we were married. Actually, while I was baptized as a Lutheran, I never attended at all growing up, however, Matt did. My Dad was a Baptist and my Mom a Lutheran, so I suppose it was easier to not go at all than to compromise and all go to one church.
Anyone who knows what has gone on in our lives in the last several months, knows a LOT has happened. While much of it has been what some would call "bad," Matt and I started to realize that it was The Lord who was placing these things in our lives and on our hearts. We started to look more closely at our faith, and made the decision to meet with the Pastor of the church associated with Alina Jayne’s school. On February 18th 2009, we were saved in the Pastor's office. From that moment forward, amazing things happened in our lives. Matt was seriously injured only three days later, and could have lost his life. We had a referral for a baby we could not adopt.....the list goes on and on, but trust me when I say, we have had MANY trials. But we have also had more blessings than we can count or deserve.
We met some wonderful people from the church shortly after Matt's accident, and they were so supportive during our difficult time. We felt we could have reached out to them at any time and they would have been there to help (and we were not even members of the church yet). We finally asked them what we had to do to officially join the church, and they told us that the next step after being saved was baptism. After watching other people being baptized for the last several weeks, we got the courage to go forward today-THANK YOU Don, Frances & Emily for being there with us and for us-we would not be truthful if we did not admit that it was your positive influence that help to lead us in this direction! A big thanks to Dawn & Brandi for coming today too-it meant so much to have you share our special day!
05/10/09
At home & the Baptism
After church, we came home to open presents. Not only my Mother's Day presents, but also Alina Jayne’s. We always get her a small gift to celebrate the anniversary of our "Gotcha Day" or "Forever Family Day" on May 9th, as well as something on the official Adoption Day on May 10th. I was finally able to open the handmade flower pot and marigold from Alina Jayne (she made it in pre-school) that she has been begging me to open since Wednesday! Alina Jayne & Matt got me a wonderful digital photo frame to display the thousands of photos I take! Alina Jayne got a new bell for her bike & sidewalk chalk for Forever Family Day, and a pair of roller-skates for Adoption Day.
After the gifts were opened, we went outside so Alina Jayne could plant her flowers for her China Tummy Mama & Foster Mama. Every year on Mother's Day, she plants a mini rose bush for her China Tummy Mama (aka Birth mom) and a lily for her Foster Mama. She also tried out the new skates, and did amazingly well-way better than I did on my first try as a kid. She is STILL mad that she cannot "go super fast." She can't accept that she cannot be perfect in all she does. We'll need to work on that!
5/10/09
Flowers for her China Tummy Mama & Foster Mama & the new skates
Last weekend we decorated my Mom's grave for Mother’s Day. We lost her to cancer in 2000, just a few months after Matt and I were married. I know she is looking down upon us today, watching me with my daughter who is named after her. She taught me so much.........I only hope that I can be half the Mother she was to my sisters and me.
Happy Mother’s Day.
1968
Saturday, May 9, 2009
3rd Anniversary-Forever Family Day
05/09/06
Meeting Alina Jayne at the Civil Affairs Office-Changsha, Hunan
& Back at the Dolton Hotel
(click collage to enlarge)
Three years ago today, at about 5:00 PM China time, we met our Alina Jayne for the very first time. The memories of that day have been a flood of emotions today. In some ways, it is hard to believe it has already been three years since we first held our baby girl. In other ways, it feels like she has always been with us. I suppose that is because she was in our hearts, LONG before she was ever in our arms. One thing is for sure-God blessed us more than we deserve, and we thank Him for her every single day.
05/09/09
At home
Happy Forever Family Day Alina Jayne. We are so very lucky to be your Mama & Daddy-WE LOVE YOU!!!
Meeting Alina Jayne at the Civil Affairs Office-Changsha, Hunan
& Back at the Dolton Hotel
(click collage to enlarge)
Three years ago today, at about 5:00 PM China time, we met our Alina Jayne for the very first time. The memories of that day have been a flood of emotions today. In some ways, it is hard to believe it has already been three years since we first held our baby girl. In other ways, it feels like she has always been with us. I suppose that is because she was in our hearts, LONG before she was ever in our arms. One thing is for sure-God blessed us more than we deserve, and we thank Him for her every single day.
05/09/09
At home
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Thankful Thursday-05/07/09
We received some very happy news a little over a week ago. A sweet member (Dani) of the small Yahoo group we belong to for parents waiting for children from Ethiopia, contacted me. She wanted me to know that she realized I have not been keeping up to date with the Yahoo groups since we placed our adoption on hold, but had good news for us.
That news was that the baby we were not able to accept, had FOUND A FOREVER FAMILY!!! She had seen the announcement on a larger Yahoo group that a family had accepted his referral! Needless to say, we are thrilled! We have been praying that he would be matched to the right family, and he was.
We still had ALL of the photos of him that we acquired from the time we accepted his referral in March. We were never sure what to do with them. On the one hand, it was too painful to look at them; but at the same time, we certainly could not get rid of them.
After I found out about his new family, I found the post on that Yahoo group and e-mailed his new Mommy, asking her if she'd like the photos. She said yes, so I mailed them to her and her husband. They were happy to receive them, but did not realize until after reading our blog (it was listed at the bottom of my e-mail to her), that Matt and I had originally received the referral for their baby. I did not mention it in my e-mail to her, just that I had the photos-I figured if she asked, I'd be happy to explain.
I did ask her to feel free to stay in touch with us, but I am not sure if she will feel comfortable doing so. If they do not feel comfortable, I fully understand, it may seem a bit awkward to them. We are still so at peace knowing he finally has a home to go to.
Stay tuned. Sunday will be a BIG day in our house. It is Mother's Day. I spent my very first Mother's Day IN China after we adopted Alina Jayne-thankfully she is a far different child now, and actually LIKES her Mama! Way different story in 2006 after I took her out of her Foster Mama's arms at the Civil Affairs Office! Sunday is also the THIRD Anniversary of Alina Jayne's Adoption Day. We met her on May 9th, 2006(Forever Family Day) and the adoption took place on May 10th, 2006. And finally-Matt and I are planning to be Baptized on Sunday. Yep, you read this correctly!
Lots and LOTS to be thankful for :O)
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Our Weekend............
We had a wonderful weekend together-it seemed to fly by, but it was great no less.
On Saturday we visited my Dad and then Matt and I went to the cemetery to decorate my Mom's grave. We do it every year, either on Mother's day or just before. Between my Dad (who designed the most beautiful stone I have ever seen), who puts seasonal silks out for her, my sisters, who add their decorations, and the landscaping Matt and I do, it looks so beautiful year round. I'll have to post some pics after the flowers we planted are in full bloom. We also had some time to plant a few seeds in our own yard once we got home.
Our church had their 82nd anniversary carnival today after the morning service. Alina Jayne wanted her Papa to go so badly. He had been feeling under the weather for the last two days, and said he could not make it. Surprisingly, he called while we were in church and said he *would* be there. She was thrilled, and I was awfully happy to see him too! We all went to lunch afterward and took some time visit, which made my weekend even better!
Once we got home from church, it was back outside to plant flowers & herbs. Alina Jayne LOVES to garden, and she loves to play in the mud.........with WORMS! She loves worms, and spent most of the afternoon making a "worm house." She was a wreck! Just before she got completely filthy, we were planing marigolds in the pots we made last spring, and that familiar music from my childhood started playing-it was the ICE CREAM TRUCK! We NEVER get a truck to come to our rural neighborhood, but there was one today. Alina Jayne asked me "Mama, who is playing that music?" I just told her it was a truck (not the "ice cream truck" in case we didn't make it out to it in time) but Matt was all over it! They were across the yard and at the truck almost faster than I could grab my camera-both completely mud/dirt covered from working in the yard! She thinks it is a really novel idea for a truck full of frozen goodies to ride around playing music!
Planting marigolds with Mama
Her first trip to the ice cream truck!
The "worm house" YUCK!
Got mud?
So now it is back to work in the morning.....sigh.
Have a great week and check back soon.
On Saturday we visited my Dad and then Matt and I went to the cemetery to decorate my Mom's grave. We do it every year, either on Mother's day or just before. Between my Dad (who designed the most beautiful stone I have ever seen), who puts seasonal silks out for her, my sisters, who add their decorations, and the landscaping Matt and I do, it looks so beautiful year round. I'll have to post some pics after the flowers we planted are in full bloom. We also had some time to plant a few seeds in our own yard once we got home.
Our church had their 82nd anniversary carnival today after the morning service. Alina Jayne wanted her Papa to go so badly. He had been feeling under the weather for the last two days, and said he could not make it. Surprisingly, he called while we were in church and said he *would* be there. She was thrilled, and I was awfully happy to see him too! We all went to lunch afterward and took some time visit, which made my weekend even better!
Once we got home from church, it was back outside to plant flowers & herbs. Alina Jayne LOVES to garden, and she loves to play in the mud.........with WORMS! She loves worms, and spent most of the afternoon making a "worm house." She was a wreck! Just before she got completely filthy, we were planing marigolds in the pots we made last spring, and that familiar music from my childhood started playing-it was the ICE CREAM TRUCK! We NEVER get a truck to come to our rural neighborhood, but there was one today. Alina Jayne asked me "Mama, who is playing that music?" I just told her it was a truck (not the "ice cream truck" in case we didn't make it out to it in time) but Matt was all over it! They were across the yard and at the truck almost faster than I could grab my camera-both completely mud/dirt covered from working in the yard! She thinks it is a really novel idea for a truck full of frozen goodies to ride around playing music!
Planting marigolds with Mama
Her first trip to the ice cream truck!
The "worm house" YUCK!
Got mud?
So now it is back to work in the morning.....sigh.
Have a great week and check back soon.
We're Back
Just wanted to let everyone know that Matt and I are are officially back on the waiting list for a referral from our adoption agency.
We had set May 1st as the deadline for our decision, and felt that was a great day to get back into the race (it was also Matt's birthday).
Many things have happened in the last few months that have made us stop and consider what is right for our family. Ultimately, we decided that if we kept waiting for the "perfect" time to adopt, it would never happen-there is no "perfect time."
So, here we are again, ready to press on and add to our family through the miracle of adoption. We know this journey will not be easy. There are bound to be more twists, turns and bumps in the road. But we have each other, and we have faith, and we know all will work out as it is supposed to.
As you have noticed, our blog is now private. We have invited specific people to view our blog and share this journey with us. After the previous emotional roller coaster, we have decided to keep things a little more low-keyed for the present time, and we appreciate your discretion. I still plan to post just as much as I did before, the only difference is, there will be far fewer people who are able to read the blog!
Thank you all for reading. We're glad you are following our journey!
Friday, May 1, 2009
05/01/09-HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATT!!
Today was Matt's b-day. He had the day off from work, so he decided to take Alina Jayne fishing with him after his physical therapy appointment this morning.
After his accident, he started going to therapy at a facility I used to refer a lot of patients to when I worked in Family Practice. His therapist (Mike) is THE BEST!
I dropped Alina Jayne off at his rehab appointment this AM on my way to work, and ran into Mike in the parking lot.
Of course I had to inform him that it was Matt's birthday (you don't think HE was going to fess up, do you)? Mike is in a band, and wondered if he should bring his guitar in and sing happy birthday to Matt, which I thought was a splendid idea! Needless to say, Matt was surprised! I'd left my phone in the car, so I asked to use Matt's to "check my voicemail" while I waited for the show to begin. I handed Alina Jayne the phone and had her take the pics-I think she did a great job!
Once we were all home, Alina Jayne and I baked and decorated Matt's cake. She was insistent that he have a STRAWBERRY cake with ORANGE tinted frosting. Okay, she was in charge of the project, whatever she wanted was fine with me. Of course, I think she had more fun licking the beaters and bowl!
Their fishing trip did not result in any "keepers." In 5 1/2 hours of fishing, the only fish caught was a perch too small to keep. No big deal, they had a great time, and I was so happy they could hang out together.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY SOULMATE. I LOVE YOU!!!!!!
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