Thankful Thursday-04/30/2009

Today I'd like to explain (as completely as I can on a blog) why I am so thankful for my Father.

My Dad came from a family of 12-number 4 of 12 to be exact. My Grandfather had a excavating business and my Grandmother stayed at home with the kids, as was standard at that time. As you can imagine, money was scarce. None of the kids were able to attend college, but most were fortunate enough to find good paying jobs which allowed them to support their families. My Dad was no exception.

My Dad worked for over 42 years for one of the Big Three Automakers. That job allowed him to support a family of three daughters and my Mom, without her having to work outside of the home. My sisters and I never had "everything the other kids had" but we never went without a thing we needed. My Dad's hard work took care of all of us.

Over the years, some people would criticize my Dad for "only being a factory worker." This assessment never ceased to baffle me-I have always known that my Dad is one of the wisest people I have known. Let me be clear about what that "factory worker" taught me.

First of all, he taught me the importance of being able to take care of myself-especially as a woman. He taught me the value of an education and a stable career, so I would never have to depend on someone else to take care of me. He taught me to never give up on my dreams-if I wanted something badly enough and worked hard enough, I'd be able to achieve it. He taught me to have self-confidence in all aspects of my life, and that I can be as good (or better) than anyone in any situation. He taught me to always follow my gut, my instincts. If something or someone did not seem right or genuine, they weren't and to never second guess myself. He taught me to never allow someone to mistreat me or anyone I love-if they mistreat you, you don't need them in your life. The most important thing my Dad has taught me is the true meaning of a parent. He has always given endless and UNCONDITIONAL love, supported us even when he might not always agree with our decisions, and sacrificed dearly to be sure his kids always had everything they needed, going without time and time again so his family did not have to.

Now his kids are adults with children of their own. I still talk to my Dad at least twice a day, still go to him for advice, and he is always there for me. But since my Mom died in 2000, he has in a sense, had to serve as both Nana and Papa-undoubtedly a tough role to fill. But he extends that same unconditional love to his grandchildren-all 8 of them. I have been blessed to see this time and time again, especially with our own daughter. In January I blogged about what a difference he has made in the life of a little girl from half way around the world (A Girl & Her Papa)

If you have not yet read that post, please drop over there and see what I am talking about. Yet another reason I am thankful for my Dad.

Wordless Wednesday-04/29/2009

May 11th, 2006-Free Day-Dolton Hotel, Changsha Hunan

Thankful Thursday-04/23/2009

As I previously mentioned, I am first and foremost, thankful for my family. This post will certainly reflect that.

I am thankful that my Mom was able to see me happy before she died. This may sound cliche, but it is not, let me explain.

I was married once before for a few years. The "marriage" was doomed from the beginning. It lacked the basic things needed to make any relationship work, especially a marriage. There was no trust, no respect, no support, and sadly, I realize now, no love either. I filed for divorce and moved on, a bitter, untrusting soul, who swore she would never allow herself to trust or be hurt again, determined to "do it on my own." I was happy living alone (at least I believed that at the time), and swore there would never, EVER be a man in my life to ruin it again. I was single, self-supportive and successful. I did not need a man and convinced myself I did not want children either.

A few years later, fate would bring Matt and I together. We had dated briefly in high school several years earlier, broke up and went our separate ways, each eventually marrying other people. In 1999, our siblings (my sister and his brother) ran into each other after many years, and started dating. They hounded us to meet them for dinner one night in June, 1999, and the rest is history. We were engaged in July, married in November, on my 31st b-day and my Mom and Dad's 32nd wedding anniversary (yes, I was their 1st anniversary present)!

While we were dating, I tried to convince myself that the feelings I was experiencing were a novelty, and would wear off in a month or so (I even bet Matt $100 it would not last a month). I had never in my life thought of someone so much, waited for the phone to ring, feeling my heart skip a beat when it did (then of course, trying to play it "cool" when I answered). I had never watched the clock tick away the minutes so agonizingly slowly, waiting for the time we could see each other again in the evening. I could not wait for him to call me each morning. I had never, ever felt so completely content, so happy.

One day I was talking to my Mom on the phone while I was at work. She mentioned that Matt and I had been seeing a lot of each other, and she wondered what I thought was going on. I told her that I had never in my life felt the things I was feeling. It was then (thanks to my Mom)I realized what I was feeling, when she told me "that's what love feels like, Kristy, when it's right, you know it."

A few weeks later, we were sitting on her patio after one of her chemo treatments. She turned to me and said, " I want to tell Matt thank you." Confused, I asked her why. Then she told me "for so long you have been so unhappy, so bitter, and honesty, not very much fun to be around sometimes. Matt gave me my daughter back, and I will always be thankful for that. YOU are back, he brings out all the good in you."

So no, this is not cliche. My husband is the reason for my happiness, the good in my life, my strength, my everything. My Mom was able to see this before she died, able to see her daughter happy, content, and in love with a man like the one she fell in love with so many years before. As a Mother, I know how much that must have delighted her heart, how much peace it gave her. I hope someday I can see this happen in my daughter's life.

November 30th, 1999

Wordless Wednesday-04/22/09 (Adoption Day May 10th, 2006-Changsha, Hunan)

Our hotel room at the Dolton-getting ready to go to the adoption appointment


Waiting with Daddy for our appointment at the Civil Affairs Office



Her footprint-it's official, we are a FAMILY!



On the bus going back to the hotel



Eating steamed eggs with Daddy


Want a bite?

A word about "Wordless Wednesday" & "Thankful Thursday"

As I mentioned in a previous post-I would like to start a tradition of "Wordless Wednesday" and "Thankful Thursday."


About Wordless Wednesday:

I will post a pic (or more) of something in my life that is special. I started this by posting pics of Alina Jayne in China when we traveled there for her adoption in 2006. Since I started there, I plan to continue posting some pics from there in chronological order. After that, the pics will be more "anything goes." Disclaimer: A caption with a date only still constitutes "wordless."


About Thankful Thursday:

I want to start by saying that I have MANY things to be thankful for, the forefront of which is and always will be my family. That being said, I am hoping to start a tradition of posting about something I am thankful for every Thursday.

Stay tuned. I hope you enjoy reading as much as I enjoy writing.

Wordless Wednesday-04/15/09

Happy Easter!!!!

What a great weekend we had. It was fairly low-keyed but so wonderful. Alina Jayne and I colored eggs on Friday-she is getting better at it, but needs to learn to place the eggs in the dye *carefully* instead of her high velocity shot-put! We still have a few cracked shells! It's okay, it makes for pretty hard-boiled eggs :O)



Her first batch


Taking a break for some hugs :O)


Our favorites

After work Saturday, I came home and did the Easter baking and other prep, so all we needed to do today was put everything into the oven (we have our holiday meal prep down to a science here). When I finished, I decided to join Alina Jayne outside to blow some bubbles and play some basketball. Turns out she was happier not sharing her bubbles, so I cleaned out flower beds and picked up many branches from our yard. Matt decided to try to see what he was capable of doing since his accident. Much to my surprise (and fear), he got the rototiller out and tilled the garden. Sure, it is self-propelled, but a mere 7 weeks ago, we weren't even sure he'd ever walk again!! He also found a spot to till so Alina Jayne can have her own small garden this year. After he showed her, the two of us went to the other side of the house to work. When it was just Alina Jayne and I, she told me "Mama, my Daddy is sooooooooo amazing!" Amen my dear! He certainly is!!!

Easter morning rolled around, and she was not all that excited about getting out of bed. I kind of hoped that since this was the first year she has referred to the bunny who brings the candy as the Easter Bunny (up until this year she called him the "Easy Bunny") that she would be more excited. Nope, it was not to be. She is the same child we had to wake up at 10:30AM on Christmas day, only to have her tell us "not now, let's sleep some more." Matt told her that the Easter Bunny had brought her some candy, but she just stayed in bed, insisting she could not *see* any candy from the bed, therefore, there was none. Actually, she got very little candy, she got more practical gifts than junk food, but she had a basket no less. She FINALLY got out of bed just before 8:30 to have a look! All she really wanted was a set of "knee pads for her elbows."


Letter & number DVD's


Magic washcloths

As I got dressed for church, she was watching me intently. Matt asked her "Doesn't Mama look nice?" She kept eying me up and down, nose wrinkled, and finally said "Um, Mama, you DON'T look like a princess" to which Daddy replied, "No honey, she looks like the future president." Now, I will admit, I have never worn or felt comfortable in dresses or skirts, so I have always had pantsuits. And my dear hubby never can seem to resist the Hillary jokes!


Alina Jayne and her "Amazing Daddy"


Alina Jayne and her Non-Princess Mama

My Dad and my niece Claudia (14) came for dinner today. We were supposed to have one additional guest, my niece Amber (almost 7). She spent the first year of her life with us after her Mama had a car accident, and we have a really great relationship because of that time we had with her. Unfortunately, her social calendar was full, so she was unable to join us. We had a great visit with my Dad and Claudie, ate entirely too much, and of course, Alina Jayne monopolized HER Papa's time and attention. She also spent a great deal of time playing (okay rough-housing and wrestling) with Claudia, who she completely adores! I must also mention that she adores and bosses Claudia constantly. "Claudie, don't ride your bike in the street, a car is gonna hit you and you'll get dead." "Claudie, you are NOT allowed to take pop to your room at Papa's," and of course, "Claudie, you are NOT allowed to eat on Papa's couch, you'll make a mess, go to the table!" Hmmm, sounds like she'd make a great older sister!


The rules of Candyland-Okay Papa, one more time, you move TWO spaces!


Teaching Papa the ways of the Internet


Wrestling with Claudie


Happy Easter!!!

Thankful Thursday-04/09/09

So, you are wondering what happened to my idea last week about posting just a pic or two on "Wordless Wednesday" right? I admit, I was remiss. Sometimes life gets in the way of my blogging (GASP)!

I thought I would title this post "Thankful Thursday" as we have so many things to be thankful for. Most importantly, we have each other, and of course, we are all so very lucky to still have Matt. Yes, I am talking about his accident again-I am reminded daily about how close we came to not having him-how easily I could be without my husband and soul mate, and Alina Jayne without her Father.

I thought an update on Matt was in order. He is doing remarkably well considering all he has been through. He saw the surgeon for the last time, who told him that 6 weeks post-op, the quadricep (thigh) muscles that were reconnected were (um, for lack of an easier way to explain non-medically)sewn together and reconnected would be as tightly connected and stable as they were going to be. The 6 week mark was last Saturday. Now that things are stable, he will be seeing another physician who will get him set up with rehab. He needs to learn how to correctly and fully use the muscles and the leg again. He can walk on the leg, but it is amazing how little things we take for granted are so difficult for him-and such milestones when he completes them. Like walking up and down stairs. We take that for granted, but he has to learn how to do this again after his accident. This is why he needs a good Physical Therapist to teach him how to strengthen the leg, and perform activities the rest of us do without giving it a second thought.

Yesterday he felt strong enough to stand on a ladder, and use his arms to pull himself into the 3rd floor attic through that same tiny opening he dropped out of when he cut his leg. I did not want him up there at all, first of all because I did not think he was strong enough, and secondly, because I was afraid it would be too stressful emotionally. However, he insisted he needed to get his tools (including the dreaded saw) out of there. I climbed part way up and looked around, and I was horrified to see how far away from the opening he was when he cut himself! I realized that after the saw cut his leg down to the bone, he actually managed to balance himself on the floor joists to get to the opening to get out of the attic-there is NO floor! It is a miracle he remianed conscious and did not fall through the ceiling to the 2nd floor below!

The area where the accident occurred looked better than I imagined (thankfully it was fairly dark when we were up there retrieving tools). We put the saw into a bag and brought it downstairs. Let's just say, parts of it were quite gruesome. I'll spare you the gory details, but I am sure you can imagine. I took some pics of it to file away-the G-rated versions are below.

Again, just *try* to tell me miracles don't happen.


In the operating room 02/21/09


On 04/08/09



The dreaded saw..............


Matt's new saw (aka the only one I'll EVER let him use again)!

Ice Fishing Anyone????

Since it was my weekend off, we decided to head out for a day of fishing. Mr. Weatherman said there would be "abundant sunshine and temps in the high 50's." Sounds great, right?

Ready for a day of fishing

It was a tad windy when we headed out this AM, but it was early and it felt pretty nice......Until we arrived at our fishing spot about 90 minutes later-the first clue that it was too cold to fish should have been when I caught the first fish and the poor guy was wearing a parka and earmuffs! BRRRR!

Yes, there was abundant sun, but the wind was so strong it over-powered the warmth of the sun. We spent about 3 hours there and decided to pack up and head home to cook our bratwurst and hot dogs-it was even too cold to stay and build a fire.

Snacking & playing with Play Doh


Her masterpiece (it is a bunny)


"The Bunny"

Despite the cold, it was great to be able to be outside, together as a family. After all, it was a mere 6 weeks ago that Matt had his accident. Things could be a whole lot different...............

Mama & Daddy's Miracle

Mama & Alina Jayne's Miracle (AKA My Soulmate)

Wordless Wednesdays-Installment #1-04/01/09

I've noticed a really cool thing on other blogs called "Wordless Wednesday." Essentially the blog author just posts a favorite picture or two on Wednesday, no blogging. I decided I'd try that out too.

What? I blogged today you say? Well, of course I did, I had to explain what I was doing! Next Wednesday will be wordless-I PROMISE!